You know it's time...

to cut your nails when you have a conversation like this:

9th grade student: Miss, why do you have crack nails?

Me: [silent thoughts in italics; spoken thoughts in bold]
Wow! I knew they were starting to chip/crack - which has been a concern but has not yet prompted me to cut my nails; I can't believe he noticed that.
You know, I'm not really sure why.
I'm taking my calcium supplements, but maybe I should actually be drinking milk....

9th grader: No - Miss - you know what I mean? CRACK nails!

Me: Oh! Right! The drug crack! Riiight.

9th grader: Yeah. So, why do you have crack nails?

Me: Well, because that's what I do. [sometimes I can't help but be sarcastic when students ask me SUCH ridiculous - and disrespectful - questions.] You know, to get through the day after working with juvenile deliquents - like YOU - I load up on crack. This is what my life has come to.

I still haven't cut my nails. But I will be soon because they are crackED...not because of my drug problem.